Thursday, January 17, 2013

Ziiip!!



Continuing with the list of embarrassing moments in church leadership, our story today involves a zipper. For a short overview of all the stories go to Don't Look at Me!, or to read the first two stories go to On Cookie Tins & Under-Garments. Today's totally awkward moment in front of a congregation is titled Ziiip!

I did as every good pastor's wife does and sat near the front row during church services. Our new church was tiny, so the front row was empty and I usually placed myself and our squirming kids on the second row from the front. With 5 and 9 year old boys, this was not the wisest choice and it did not lend itself to relaxed worshiping, that's for sure. Just one of those silly rules we place on ourselves as leaders. 

BUT this particular Sunday it was the very best spot for me. 

It was during our Adult Sunday School Class. Hubs sat up front on the same level as the class on a high stool. Hubs loved and still loves a class with lots of give and take discussion. On this morning he was answering a question when I suddenly noticed that something was not right. His zipper was not zipped!

If he were standing behind a pulpit, no problem. But he was sitting on a high stool and this could be dangerous indeed. My options were limited. We were still new at this church and I was not comfortable enough to just go up to him and whisper in his ear, though I considered it. But he would still have to turn around to fix the problem and there was no way it could be taken care of in a subtle way.

I decided to write him a note on a pew card/offering envelope. I still did not want to get up, so I wrote in big dark letters "ZIP", and held it in my lap so that he could see it but the people behind me could not. It took a while for him to notice my little sign........

But when he did see it, he immediately said aloud, "Zip? Want me to shut up?" as he motioned a 'zip your lip' kind of hand signal across his mouth! I motioned to his zipper and he sheepishly turned around and repaired it. 

The Sunday School Class ended with lots of laughter and I doubt anyone remembers the lesson.
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10 comments:

  1. Oh I wish I could tell this church tale about my husband-- anyone but me. But since we're talking garment faux pas... Once, upon coming out of the church ladies' room, a fellow parishioner gently pointed out, "Julie, the back of your skirt is tucked up in your pantyhose..." If only that particular kind church soul hadn't been MALE.... Sigh... I'm sure the image scarred him for life.

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    1. Oh Julie! Yikes. Haha! Thanks for sharing......That's what HE said!! haha!

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  2. You handled that very well. I am still shaking with laughter. Things like that happen to all of us in one way or another...but when it's a Pastor...everyone out there expects him to be perfect...I always thought it was a good idea to dispel the myth. LOL

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  3. That is so funny! It's funny how often it happens when we try to be discreet about something our husbands loudly exclaim things like, "WHY ARE YOU TAPPING MY LEG?" lol

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  4. BAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I think other than your clever description of this situation that makes it so funny, is we can all relate to one of those awkward and embarrasing moments when we were attempting to be so polite and descreet and failed miserably : ) Thanks for the laugh.

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  5. Hee hee hee! Good one:) You should do that Indiana Jones thing and write "I LOVE YOU" on your eyelids and slow blink at him.

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  6. This is right up there when it comes to embarrassing moments. When I was working in the 1970's the phrase people used was "XYZ" translated it means "Examine Your Zipper."

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  7. I loved this Susie! I almost spit iced across my computer when I got to your husband's response! I love those moments that mortify us at the time but become such great stories to tell later! :)

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    1. YAY for causing an almost spit!!! My life is now worthwhile! Thanks Dayle.

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  8. Haaaaaa!!!!!!! Good golly that's funny! This made me think of one that happened to our Pastor. It was about 20 years and many churches ago. He was up talking and turned to walk across the stage. And there, on his butt, was a big piece of gum. I was sitting with our other pastor's wife. We started laughing and when he started to pray, and we all dutifully (not me of course) bowed our heads, she went up to him, put her hand on his shoulder and whispered - as he started to pray - "there's gum on the seat of your pants, just keep praying." He did. When she sat back down, there was a hearty AMEN!

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