|Apparently the Red Wasps may think this is a hornets nest|
and decide to build elsewhere. (It's a paper bag I put up there.)
We'll see. Ugly & I don't care.
Ok y'all, yes I said "Y'all", I went to bed last night feeling guilty for posting so many negative status updates on Facebook about Texas since our move. Of course, I have also been pretty upbeat because I love my new house and am still in love with my swimming pool. My FB updates have not been with a negative attitude, they were mostly to be funny as I navigate this new world I am finding myself in.
|THE MIXMASTER !!|
But quite honestly, between confusing & aggressive freeways, Red Wasps, Fire Ants, snakes, floods and tornado warnings, there has been a bountiful supply of things to grumble about as a transplant from California.
So this morning I was determined to wax poetic about our magical and mystical Fireflies which I adore. We get to watch them from our back porch and I jump with happiness and excitement every time I see that sweet little flicker of light in the darkness around our trees. You almost wonder if you imagined it...and then, there it is again!
But my poetic waxing was once again interrupted by frantic barking from Layla. This time she found a snake only 3 feet from me and my bare feet on the porch. Thankfully it was on the other side of the screen and trying to get to a large hole in the screen and onto MY area. After her last bad encounter Layla only barked at it, she knew not to get too close. Curt got rid of it for us and everyone is fine.
|Fire Ants in my pool.|
No, we are not fine at all though. I am not fine. I went inside and found an email from my neighbor saying that a neighbor two doors down from me killed a 5 foot venomous Water Moccasin last week! You guys! I have battled fear all of my life...and I thought that I had won some pretty big fear battles. But here I am again. Hello God, what's the deal? Seriously.
One problem with having a specific fear is that you cannot win. If I am afraid of driving on the chaotic 6 lane freeway or I'm afraid of stepping on a snake, I have to alter my life so those things cannot happen. If I try to prove that the bad thing could happen, the ONLY way to prove it is for it TO HAPPEN. See? If I successfully navigate the freeway system and do not cause a crash, then I am proving that the fear was silly and wrong. But if I die on the freeway I will prove that the fear was JUSTIFIED. See? Cannot win. It's a no win-no win all the way around.
|People, these are not the streets around my home, these are all Freeways!!! |
I'm in the middle of what the news calls "The Mixmaster"!!
Now I know that these are all very TINY problems in the world wide view. How dare this woman complain about a snake in her yard when so much that is so horrible is happening out there in the world. But fear is fear. It freezes us up and shrinks our world. My world is shrinking due to my fear of these crazy freeways.
I do not want to live like this. Sheesh you guys, I am writing a book about how much God loves us and how He showed me how to escape my rigid cocoon and find my wings! I am not seeing that bold butterfly today. Today the butterfly is cowering in her living room afraid of her own back porch!
I'd planned to wax poetic about the fireflies for you. It seemed wrong to use my blog to complain, it is supposed to be a place of encouragement and an example of ....something, I don't know...something good and strong and full of faith right?
I will end it with this sweet Baboo peering at you from over my shoulder. I want this little grandson of mine to know his grandma as a brave and kind woman. I want to conquer these silly fears so that I do not become an old odd recluse who is afraid to come outside her door. He is worth it. We moved here for two reasons, economy and family. This little guy will make me brave enough to get on the road...some day.
For today, I am the limping butterfly.